sometimes i just can't help myself. i want to do all of those dirty little things with the guys that i know that i shouldn't touch. but i can't help it. lust. i always figured that it was okay as long as no one found out, but then i have this cloud of guilt over my head, and i always end up disappointing people.
i'm addicted to the feeling. the feeling that you get when you really like someone... that fluttering in your heart, and that twisting of your stomach. the jitters. the butterflies. all of those things. that is how i feel when i'm hooking up with someone that i know i shouldn't be with. and i'm addicted to the feeling. one good hookup can get me on that high for days. not having that feeling is the worst, it's like nicotine withdrawals, horrible.
everyone that i have ever been with, i know that i shouldn't have. it was either the time, or the place, or the person that was wrong. but no matter what it was, i still did it. sometimes i seek out the bad situation because it just heightens the feeling. synergy.
something is wrong with me.
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